On
Being Quiet
Before
she knew it, Mariah had consumed a half gallon tub of Blue Bell rocky road ice
cream. Her emotions were so raw she’d
lost track of time again. Her body that
was no longer a svelte size seven, lumbered across the four feet into the
kitchen and rinsed the empty tub in the sink before tossing it into the garbage
can. She couldn’t afford to have ants in
the kitchen again. Malcolm was sure to
lecture and non-too nicely. Mariah
placed the spoon into the half empty dish washer which she refused to cut on
until she had a full load. She didn’t
want to get into it with Malcolm about not conserving energy. She’d just eaten a dose of sweet pain away
after he’d accused her of over drafting the checking account again.
Malcolm had been vicious when he tore into
her about being irresponsible. He made
her feel like such a worthless dumb butt. She bit back the tears as he yelled at her and refused to interrupt his
tirade. All she could think about at the
time was that this was the man who had promised to love, honor and cherish her
until death parted them.
When
Malcolm finally left for work Miriam sat down on the lime green Naugahyde couch
in the living room with the frayed lesions on the seat cushion where her butt
had shaped a permanent dimple and opened a box of Lorna Doones to go with the
ice cold glass of milk on the TV tray beside her. She knew she shouldn't indulge and she was on
her way to yet another rant from Malcolm about her weight. She could only hope that maybe it wouldn't be
so bad this time. Who am I kidding? she
thought.
With the first bite, Mariah
said good bye to her resolve to lose the extra pounds that hung around her
middle and along with it her dream that she would ever be happy again.
We’ve
all been there at one time or another.
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